today, when i was at office depot, the male (and i think gay) black cashier called me "ma'am." i lived in a predominantly black neighborhood, and this happens almost any time i make a trip to my favorite walgreens or goodwill. i guess i never really paid it much mind before. but then i thought, what's going on here? this is kind of a backwards, old fashioned southern-tipped neighborhood, so is this what i really think it is? it's this some black-white courtesy shit going on here? am i called a "ma'am" because i am a white chick?
i could be totally reading into this (probably am), but it weirded me out. i guess i shouldn't be too surprised if it's true. the world is still really backwards, especially in economically depressed areas, regardless of how charming they may be. granted, you still have your fair share of haters ("white BITCH... white BITCH..."), there are also the elderly men and women, and sometimes younger, that tip their hat to ya.
i won't let it get to me. i love this area despite all it's faults. i actually love it for it's flaws. cruising down jefferson is one of the most inspiring drives for me in all of los angeles. so many abonded shops, decaying signage, vibrant colors, old tags and newer graffiti, crude an dying jet beautiful foliage; it's all just so fucking poetic. i love having my studio around here.
however. when it comes to living here AND working here, it's becoming a bit much-- i am at my wit's end seeing the seedy underbelly of the state of our union. it's real, very real, and i think it's too much realness for me. i've had my experience, done my time, but it ain't really my jam anymore.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment